following:
Question: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is
this true?
> Answer: Your heart is only good for so many beats and that's it . . .
don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer - take a nap!
>
> Question: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruit and vegetables?
> Answer: You must grasp the logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat?
Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain?
Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (it's a green leafy
vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of slop.
> Question: Is beer or wine bad for me?
> Answer: Look - it goes to the earlier points about fruits and vegetables.
As we all know, scientists divide everything in the world into three
categories: Animal, Mineral and Vegetable. We all know that beer and wine are not animal, and they are not on the periodic table of elements, so that only leaves one thing right? My advice . . . have a burger and a beer and enjoy your liquid vegetables. Besides, what do you think barley, hops and grapes are anyway?
Question: How do I calculate my body/fat ratio?
Answer: Well if you have a body and you have body fat, your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.
Question: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular
exercise programme?
> Answer: Can't think of a single one - sorry! My philosophy is . . . no
pain is good . . . why do you take aspirin or does the dentist use Novocaine?
Anyway, if you were meant to touch your toes they would be on your knees!
Question: Aren't fried foods bad for you?
> Answer: You're not getting this are you? Foods are fried these days in
> vegetable oil. In fact they're permeated in it. How could getting more
> vegetables be bad for you?
>
> Question: What's the secret to healthy eating?
> Answer: Thicker gravy
>
> Question: Will sit-ups help prevent me getting a little soft around the
> middle?
> Answer: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach.
>
> Question: Is chocolate bad for me?
> Answer: Are you crazy? HELLLOOO!! . . . Cocoa beans . . . another
> vegetable!!! It's the best 'feel good' food around!!
>
UserAgent: Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 6.0; Windows NT 5.1; SV1; .NET CLR 1.1.4322)
3.0 
