"Cars in BMW's new line, the BMW 7 Series, are equipped with a special kind of Windows: the Microsoft kind."
Reported by C|Net's News.com, BMWs hit the road with Microsoft (March 4, 2002)
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Microsoft's Windows CE software will allow BMW drivers to navigate, make calls and control many of the cars' other features. The BMW 7 Series was launched in Germany last fall and has just been released in the United States.
The new line of BMWs use a navigating system from Siemens, called the Siemens VDO Automotive AG, which includes Microsoft's operating system. Microsoft also recently announced the launch of Windows CE for Automotive v3.5, the newest version of its software for cars based on Windows CE.
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So what's special about Microsoft BMW? (from PCTalk.info)
- There are the top 15 features of a Windows Car
- Damage from frequent crashes greatly limited by agonizingly slow speeds.
- MS-AAA mysteriously knows where you are and what you ran into before you even call.
- Lets you e-mail viruses to jerks who cut you off in traffic.
- Sure, you *own* the car -- but your nerdy 17-year-old nephew is the only one who can figure out how to drive it.
- Engine trouble? Just execute a Ctrl+Alt+Honk and the car repairs itself.
- "Crowby," the annoying, animated crowbar, keeps changing the radio station.
- It doesn't matter how good it is, those techno-snobs with the free Linux cars always look down on you.
- It's a royal pain to try to pull into a non-Microsoft gas station.
- Now only takes THREE MINUTES to start.
- Whenever you leave your driveway, the little paperclip guy jumps out of the glove box and says, "It looks like you're going to work! Can I help?"
- You have to reinstall the entire engine once a month.
- After putting it in park, it shakes and rattles for a couple minutes before you finally get the signal that it's safe to turn off the engine.
- Despite reassurances of improved security from Microsoft, hackers can easily gain entry by simply using the door handles.
- You can't lend it to someone else; they have to purchase their own.
- You have to pull to the side of the road, turn off and restart the engine whenever you change CD's.
> related joke If Microsoft Built Car
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